Early Sexual Initiation: Is sex a prerequisite to “true” love?

“Hindi ako mabubuhay ng wala ka, kasi mahal na mahal kita.”

“Mahal ko siya at susuportahan ko siya na matupad ang mga pangarap niya.”

“Magpapakamatay ako kasi iniwan ako ni girlfriend/boyfriend.”

The Philippine Rural Reconstruction Movement (PRRM) conducts peer seminars to areas that have high incidence of teenage pregnancies. The quoted statements above are frequent answers of teenagers when asked about their concept of “pag-ibig” during seminars. These are statements that we thought only stupid/idiotic characters in cheesy romantic movies would say but apparently some people understand love this way. They develop this idea of passive dependency (e.g. “I can’t live without you.”) that leads them to have sex. Don’t get me wrong in this one; I love romantic movies. Anyway, one of our main activities in PRRM is to observe in a peer seminar about sex education in Brgy. Bagong Silang, Caloocan City that has high rates of teenage pregnancy. Unfortunately, I was not able to come with the group when they went to Caloocan.

When peer educators conduct a peer seminar, they bring with them modules that will aid the participants throughout the discussion. According to one of the modules titled, Kwentuhan Pangkabataan: Teenage Pregnancy, there are 7 reasons why teenagers say yes to sex. These are: curiosity, conformity, rebellion, sexual conquest, physical satisfaction, “to save the relationship,” and to feel intimate and cared for. All of which are self-explanatory so I don’t need to dwell on the details anymore. PRRM’s prescribed solution for this is to develop the skill to say NO. Apparently, saying NO is now a skill. However, reality is that sex appears to feel so good and “satisfying” that teenage couples can’t abstain from it. It’s a good thing that the peer educators also teach modern contraceptives and safe sex.

Now, why is it so important to stop teenage pregnancy? Maternal death for teen moms is 2 times more than an adult. There is also a social risk of school interruption, unemployment and poverty. Emotional risk is also a problem because the parents might not be matured enough to take care of their child.

Lastly, why did I even write this blog anyway? I wrote this blog because Valentine’s Day is coming and I don’t want my dear readers to engage in risky behaviors. I’m not telling you not to have sex of course! Just stay safe and protected if you’re going to. 😉  If you want a copy of the module just comment your email down below. I swear that it’s really interesting.

Espino, Jose Mari C.

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9 thoughts on “Early Sexual Initiation: Is sex a prerequisite to “true” love?

  1. This is an eye-opener, there are certain topics, like sex, that people tend to move away from, but here you are trying to explain it in a very light way. Good Job! Hahaha 😄

  2. It’s nice that you were able to discuss this topic in an interesting way and I think those seminars and modules would really help teenagers understand easily pre-marital sex, teenage pregnancies and the like.

  3. I think that pre-marital sex that leads to teenage pregnancies is one of the roots why different problems and issues arise in our society. It’s good to be aware and to be able to understand it so that we would know how to deal with issues in our society.

  4. I believe in your points. There are so many social implications about the “unwanted pregnancy” issue. I hope that someday, there will a comprehensive, suitable sex education for Filipino people.

  5. Thank you for trying to help us prepare for our Valentine’s day activities! Kidding aside, it’s good that there are people that are willing to educate teenagers on abstinence and safe sex. It’s better to face the problem face on than let it be the elephant in the room.

  6. Saying NO is definitely a skill that we must all develop. We should be aware and educated regarding these issues. OR learn the hard way. :)) Sabi nga nila, nasa huli ang pagsisisi. We don’t want that.

  7. I also believe that this is an issue that we should all be educated about. The puppy love that may serve as inspiration for some but for others be the ‘true love’ they perceive they are experiencing might lead to impulsive actions that lead to unwanted pregnancies. Also, we should understand the sensitivity of this matter and the way this is discussed in schools. Moreover, successful sex education will be a big factor in lessening teenage pregnancies and enable people to understand the responsibilities of being parents.

  8. I believe pre-marital sex is not bad per se; it’s just that people have to be rational when choosing to engage in the said activity. Education and guidance are needed so that smarter decisions can be made. The Philippines lacks both, because sex is such a taboo in the Philippine culture. That needs to change. It’s better to be safe than sorry

  9. I have to agree with you that pre-marital sex is really not the problem here, it’s the teenage pregnancy. We all have our opinions about it (pre-marital sex), if we are for it or not. Well, despite being in a dominant Catholic country, I can say that sex is becoming less taboo than before that is why teenage pregnancy is increasing. I hear some of my batchmates in high school getting pregnant and initially, it surprise but eventually, I just think about their babies and hoping that they will be good parents.
    Sexual education can maybe help this issue.

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